Hormone Hell

A friend gave Toby and I tickets to the Clemson game. We were excited because we don’t get to go to many games and Clemson promised to be a good game. I was glad it was a night game, because Toby has had some heart problems and I thought it would be better for him sitting through the game at night, instead of in the heat of the day.

Toby decided that we would be able to find a parking spot, so instead of riding the transit, we drove. We spent quite a long time trying to find a parking spot. We finally parked almost to Wrights Mill Road School – no joke…and we began the long trek to the stadium. I started out a little worried about Toby, because it was extremely hot and humid and so I kept stopping and asking him how he was doing. In the meantime, I was becoming hotter and hotter. The more I stopped and asked Toby how he was doing, the more he noticed that I was getting redder and redder, but being the southern gentleman that he was raised to be, he didn’t say anything. (Okay, I had on a sleeveless shirt, a pair of lightweight Capri pants, and flip flops, so I had on the ‘airiest’ clothes I had while still being in public.) Anyway, we finally got to the stadium. I thought I was going to die!!! I was so hot!!! I felt like I was literally going to burn up. Toby and I went in and stayed in the shade a little bit, taking in the slight hot breeze. I kept asking Toby how he was doing and he kept saying he was fine. I guess part of me was hoping that he was as hot and miserable as I was. Sad, but true, misery does love company. We found our seats, in the upper deck, in the sun and sat down. We were right on the isle, right behind the stairs, so people kept coming up and down and for some reason that just made me hotter. I made it through the 1st quarter and ½ and finally told Toby I needed to go and try to find some cool air. At that point, Toby commented that I did look a little hot. A little hot!!! I felt like I was on fire!!! I went and stood in the entrance and took in the breeze, but no matter how I tried I couldn’t get cool. I stood there through the 1st part of half time, then I looked up at Toby and told him that I needed to go home. He nodded and came down. At that point, He said he was worried about me because I was really red. I wanted to snap his head off and tell him, yes, not only was I red, but I was miserable! Being the somewhat proper person I try to be, I didn’t though. I merely said that I needed to go home and get cool. He nodded and said he was fine with that. A wise man!!!

On the way out of the stadium we saw those little rickshaw bikes and I decided to see how much they would charge to take us to our cars. I thought that would be fun and much cooler than trying to walk all the way back to the car. He took one look at us and said it would be $30.00 to take us two blocks over. Toby said he was figuring how hard he would have to peddle to get us anywhere. I was not amused! Of course we declined, but I really didn’t know if I could make it all the way back to my car. We did of course, and Toby cranked up the air as high as he could and we went home and watched the 2nd half of the game in the wonderful coolness of our home.

When I was retelling this to a friend of mine over lunch one day, of course she was laughing, but then she said, I was living in “hormone hell”. Never heard it called that before, but realized that was exactly what it was.

As some of you ladies know, it’s a miserable feeling. For those who are too young to have experienced “hormone hell” yet, let me just say that very little prepares you for the mood swings, hot flashes, memory loss and just basically wanting to annihilate something when experiencing a severe hot flash.

As I was thinking about this experience, I couldn’t help but think that what I went through is nowhere near how hot Hell will be and I’m so thankful that I won’t be there! Hallelujah!